So I find it interesting and misguided the fascination that married people have with single people? Although I realize the sentiment isn’t necessarily malice, it is in itself peculiar to ask “Why are you single?” I have wondered should I be asking couples “Why are you married?” SMH , I don’t know, it just never occurred to me to wonder about another persons path and choices in life? I wasn’t aware that we were all on the same path and had the same goals in life? Where did I go wrong; I don’t think I have? Maybe if I somehow felt equipped to plan my life in this broken world and see everything and know all, it might be an option? Maybe it is because I’m a perfectionist, so naturally I am seeking and trusting the only perfect, constant, and truth in life that I know; which is the creator and designer of my life and others.
So to explain: I am single because I do not have an agenda in this world. I humbly realize Gods plans and timing are so much better than my own. I know this because I have taken my time and practiced patience; which the Bible promotes! Patience is a virtue and we become what we seek. Secondly, why is it assumed that if you are not married, it is a must have? Sadly the worldly idea of marriage does not intrigue me at all. I am 43 and know several people my age that have been married and divorced twice by now; this alone should cause people to question timing of marriage and that it should not be rushed? Maybe, just maybe, I was meant to be like Paul and single? I have no idea because I never got those specific plans that apparently the rest of the married people received? lol I’m thankful I have always been able to embrace my path and choose the less traveled road and I haven’t done it on my own. Typically in past relationships they distracted me from my relationship with God, which is a big red flag. All I know is that I guess I’m lazy and want God to figure it out for me? 😉 I also sometimes wonder if desiring marriage so badly could actually lead to spiritual coveting; which is not a choice that God allows my heart to make. There are so many scriptures that speak to me in my singleness.
1 Corinthians 13:4-5New Revised Standard Version (NRSV)
4 Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;
If you seek Love in a marriage, you better be patient since Love is patient! Maybe that is a major difference in what I seek? I am not seeking marriage, I seek Love, and honestly I don’t feel void of it being single. If you aren’t able to experience Love while single, you will never be able to give any to receive and doing it wrong. I experience great love from friends, family, and even others I’ve never met or seen. Love is spiritual and too many focus on the physical it seems?
My theory is, if you focus on what you don’t have, you will miss what you have. So I am focusing on what I have in Christ and sincerely grateful.
Ecclesiastes 6:9New Living Translation (NLT)
9 Enjoy what you have rather than desiring what you don’t have. Just dreaming about nice things is meaningless—like chasing the wind.
Maybe, just maybe, I have something being single that most people can’t see and it’s called faith, hope, and Love and it’s more than enough for me!