Psalm 14:3 New International Version
3 All have turned away, all have become corrupt;
there is no one who does good, not even one.
Skepticism is wisdom; the Bible teaches it in abundance. The entire purpose of life is a battle with the Cross as our refuge in times of trouble. Christ is the antidote and peace, without us even understanding, on the journey to hopefully overcoming the systems that have been produced by flawed men. According to scripture, this world is not our home and we are warned many times to set ourselves apart, not conform to the patterns of this world; leading to confusion and deception. Yet still, even people that attend church and read their Bible become conditioned to the “normal” routines, without any awareness, despite the contrast of Biblical teaching. I suspect because people crave comfort and satan is the master of illusion and comfort. It is why I have learned to be a glutton for punishment; no pain, no gain.
Proverbs 4:23 New International Version (NIV)
23 Above all else, guard your heart,
for everything you do flows from it.
Genesis 6:5 New International Version (NIV)
5 The Lord saw how great the wickedness of the human race had become on the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of the human heart was only evil all the time.
Masks are the current illusion assigned by the world, to protect us from another created illusion, that experts know nothing about. Can’t help but question how so many can be naive to blindly follow flawed men, instead of seeking and finding what the Lord is able to reveal? Fear is the tool that best steals control from God. It becomes obvious why the Bible devotes so much significance on the topic of fear. Who could imagine a virus would provoke such irrational emotions; leading to coveting, idolatry, and based on forbidden control. The media is the accomplice and means of attack. Living in the Spirit naturally produces hunger for truth. The current promotion of masks triggered discernment red flags. As a result, I naturally sought the Lord for revelations that helped expose the evil behind the mask agenda . Living immune suppressed for almost 27 years, specifically the last 5 years being the most severe, you learn to experience the value of our internal defense system, because you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone. It also reveals the supplemental life insurance that only the Maker of Heaven and earth can provide.
Ephesians 6:10-19 New International Version (NIV)
The Armor of God
10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
Put on the armor of God, instead of a worthless mask! Spiritually a mask represents division and hiding. Why would anyone need a mask when we have a Savior, who created our divine immune system for survival and provided Biblical instructions for safety and true comfort. What would Jesus do? Has anyone even bothered to ask? Obviously Not, because I know Jesus would not wear a mask or encourage His followers to wear masks. I know this based on spiritual discernment and intimacy with Christ. The Holy Spirit does not disappoint, how would anyone expect someone in my situation to have survived influenza-b, pneumonia, and all the exhausting illness’ over half my life; while my greatest physical defense was disabled. You don’t persist without discovering the supernatural assignments that the enemy tries hiding in comfort and illusion. Our redeemer is the same today, as yesterday and there are no mentions about masks in the Bible for a reason despite the history of plague’s.
The Lord continues to speak the song “This Little Light Of Mine” over my soul and inspired substitution of an analogy with a mask:
This little smile of mine, I'm gonna let it shine..... This little face of mine, I'm gonna let it shine..... Won't let satan hide my heart, I'm gonna share my joy.......Won't let satan mask my breathe, I'm gonna breathe freely.......share my soul and show my faith, showing my face
Matthew 7:7-12 New International Version (NIV)
Ask, Seek, Knock
7 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.
9 “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! 12 So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.
18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. 19 Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel,
I was inspired to create a collection of resource’ in the battle against this demonic “new normal”; ignoring evidence, truth, and most importantly, the power of Jesus Christ. There is extensive information that contradicts the media monopoly demanding compliance to guidelines by self imposed “experts”. Fear and censorship are the most obvious biased and demonic fruits involved with this agenda, producing coveting and promoting idolatry. Hiding and stealing a communities options to discern information to decide how to approach circumstance’s, is straight out of the devil’s handbook. Hopefully there are others lead to take the time to seek and find the truth and care to invest time to explore the diverse collection that has been revealed to me by reputable source’. Caring is sharing! Of course the enemy is trying to shutdown those that speak truth, however, praying daily for divine restraining orders against the oppression of demonic trolls. I will continue to update with evidence based information that I encounter in hopes of making this post a powerful resource and defense against the enemy.
The only purpose of the news media is their obvious reporting that reveals an agenda; kill, steal, and destroy. Once again, my experience with chronic illness has allowed the Holy Spirit to continue using it to expose the demonic nature of the worldly system and use it for good. The corona virus news is completely irrational for both physical and spiritual reasons; revealing spiritual deception. It took 22+ years of being in bondage to our medical system to learn the very hard way that it has never been about healing,fixing, or wellness; if it was, I would not have lived over 26 years immune suppressed and currently disabled. However, the disappointment lead me to the cross; which was where it needed to begin. It took approximately 2 years for the medical community to even put a label on my illness, but it didn’t stop them from treating the symptoms. Once I was diagnosed, it also didn’t change the way they treated the symptoms because the root cause is irrelevant to actually correcting and repairing in a worldly system that blindly serves satan. On top of my diagnosis, being immune suppressed exposed me to a wide variety of sickness; virus, bacteria, parasites, and fungus; yet only testing for a specific virus (influenza) once in 2015, during the entire history. Accordingly they blindly treated the multiple illness’ with antibiotics on occasion, despite any evidence or proof of infection. Viral testing is not typical in the medical practice despite virus’ being very typical. This alone should speak volumes about the lack of willingness of the healthcare system to achieve answers. The customary practice is based on assumption/presumption that involve symptom resolution and not health. In fact, I have survived numerous virus’, including influenza-b, pneumonia, and shingles twice over the last 26 years with immune suppression. It was a medication that almost killed me; causing a-plastic anemia with a hemoglobin of 4.6. Not so ironically that medication was hydroxychloroquin, the medication they are testing to treat corona virus; which is a sulpha medication. There is far greater risk taking any medication; just read the drug profile warnings. It’s actually ironic all the names assigned to illness’ when at the core, the problems are based on similar biologic dysfunction that manifest differently in the body.
From the beginning of this viral conspiracy, my heavenly sensor was triggered deeply by all the inconsistency and the not so coincidental, even convenient, power play it was appearing to seek. The media keeps pushing the need for testing of the virus, however, testing for the corona virus or any other virus is completely irrelevant, because it doesn’t produce a solution; specifically the way it is treated. Labeling any illness is just a way to appear they can control it; built on lies and mind control. This becomes very apparent if you have ever had to deal with the medical system and doctors for any length of time. All men are flawed and prone to deception, including those that happen to study and receive a degree in any subject; including medicine. Studying flawed information only makes you an expert in deception. Our entire education system is nothing more than a system of intellectual idolatry when it is tested against scripture. The Bible is our tool for discernment and surviving all forms of deception. This world is untrustworthy and we have an epidemic of trusting idols which can only lead to destruction. We have a fear and idolatry pandemic and need to be more concerned with what is hidden spiritually; behind all the extreme focus! Do you discern deflection?
Our media reports hearsay which is unreliable information. .
There is nothing rational about locking people away to hide from exposure to a specific microorganism among many. It reveals complete ignorance of the biologic system; which include virus’, bacteria, and parasites within the natural flora and completely disregards the immune system all together.
Sadly my favorite past time lately has been debunking all the media lies and the lies are plenty. The Bible teaches us to test spirits and there are demonic spirits evident to those involved in the content of the media. The media has a condition I would compare to ADHD and nearsighted in context. The focus exploits while eliminating far greater threats; vehicle collisions, aging, accidents, obesity, alcoholism, diabetes, opioids, and even iatrogenic death. The list is never ending in a proper perspective. The media perspective of the current corona virus crisis is an agenda based on presumption which is realistically unfounded. Spiritually and rationally this effort is completely blown out of proportion and leads to demonic spiritual fruits. We live by faith, not sight, and certainly not by worldly understanding. The purpose of the media is fear based and the corona virus is the current weapon of choice. Not only does the Bible warn numerous times of the source of fear being spiritually demonic but, in addition, there are physical repercussions, which impact the physical body that are harmful; causing hormone production, inflammation, confusion, and immune suppression. Fear is an assault to life physically that is perpetuated spiritually. The crisis is completely irrational when you actually analyze all the information available regarding this virus exposure. I’ve included the statistics from the World Health Organization so you can use your own mind about the truth.
The misunderstanding of virus’ and ignorance of the human body is apparent with the use of masks. Virus’ do not fly or remain suspended in the air. A virus is contracted by touching something that has the viral protein on it’s surface. After it is on your hand the protein is transmitted by touching your face,nose,eyes where it has access to travel by way of the lymphatic system via mucous to the lungs. There is a false understanding that you breathe in a respiratory virus. I suppose if somebody coughed in your face or was close enough when coughing, without covering their mouth, it could potentially be inhaled but it is unlikely. There is a reason why so much emphasis is placed on hand washing for prevention because hands and skin are the transmitters that the protein obtains access to mucous carriers within the bodies lymphatic system.
Further more, the statistics by the CDC have been continually manipulated to exploit this virus in an attempt to politicize and weaponize it.
Romans 12:2 New International Version (NIV) 2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
At the root of any physical crises is a spiritual manifestation. This world is the enemy and therefor our focus always needs to start much deeper, where the enemy operates. In order to know the enemy, we must be able to recognize spiritual fruits the Bible exposes in Galatians 5:19-25. The Bible truly is the best source and provides healing at the source. I believe all illness is rooted in deception, being disconnected from our Creator and treating the divine physical body as a temple. This world keeps us running in circles, chasing the next crises and cure, when stillness is where we find we already possess access to our own power and well being. You can’t focus on Christ and His truth when you are captivated by the media and world; which is the strategy of the demonic world. Seek the Kingdom of Heaven first! Spiritual discernment saves lives.
During difficult times I have been continually lead to the Word and quiet time with Christ. While the world screams of chaos, it presents an awareness of the spiritual ignorance that is the real threat. Understanding the spiritual process of sanctification and knowing Christ produces peace in the truth of scripture. As a result it becomes apparent the true identity of any conflict according to “fruits”. If people were inclined to turn off the TV and open their Bible to spend time with our Lord and Savior, we would not have a crisis. Reality is based on perception and it points to the source of our motivation.
The way we deal with uncertainty lets us know whether Jesus is ahead of us leading, or behind us just carrying our stuff. ~Bob Goff
Finally, I would like to add a source from Dr. John Bergman who is always thought provoking and provides diverse documentation with reliable information. I have been subscribing to his channel for several years now during my journey trying to recover my health after allopathic mismanagement of my illness. He has an ideal combination of spiritual wisdom combined with solid understanding of human anatomy and biology. I have found his material to effectively communicate complex issues with a gift for teaching. It is obvious his intent is to truly help people and challenge the unfortunate ways of the world.
While preparing for a request of review to the Appeals Council I decided it could be eye opening to share my experience with others in hopes the process could be better understood and exposed. As I was forming the content it really challenged me to the depths of it’s impact and initiated a growth of purpose. I can’t help but want to pursue change to this system that tortures people in their most vulnerable moments. It’s almost as if it would have to be intentional and a source of evil. I have been almost obsessed with psychology the last few years in my journey dealing with so much insanity in the world. The closer I come to understanding, the more I come to the conclusion that psychology was created by man in an attempt to explain and label the unseen spiritual fruits of satan? I have always insisted social security should be a private entity and I can’t help but want to expose the administration for what it truly is; a tool for satan. The process is biased, absent of due process, and ssa gets to decide which evidence will be used to manipulate, aka witchcraft. The hearing is basically an interview where you are put on trial and anything you say, can and will be used against you. There is no recourse until the determination; which happens approximately 3 months later. I demand limited government!
First of all, I wanted nothing to do with the government and didn’t even start the application process until over a year had passed after losing my job, when it became apparent I no longer had a chance at earning an income with my limitations. So on January 3, 2017 I submitted my application. Of course it was denied and I appealed waiting in limbo until I could get a hearing. I was notified a couple months prior to my hearing date that it was scheduled for November 19, 2018. In the mean time I had found legal representation online and had communicated with staff by phone and email; never meeting until my hearing. An attorney contacted me the Friday before the hearing to go over my case in preparation of the hearing. Needless to say, I ended up in tears during the conversation. It was actually quite annoying and remember Andrew commenting “I’ve done many of these hearings, just never as complicated as yours.” Umm he waits until 3 days before the hearing to figure this out? All the records had been sent at point of contact with health providers. I really wanted this to go well and made sure I was keeping up with my responsibility; in hopes things would flow accordingly. Right then I knew this was not going to go well but it was the Friday before my hearing on Monday, so I was without options at this point. Not trusting this attorney I decided I would bring a file with the most significant records involving my case and arrived well in advance hoping to review my case with the poor excuse for legal representation. As he was looking over the documents I provided, he acted as if he had never seen the report of my brain MRI from September 2017? I had been given confirmation via email from the legal assistant following the results. Living with a chronic illness for as long as I have you definitely learn the importance of communication and the need to be proactive. My hearing day had arrived and during the broadcast, as I like to call it, because you are sitting at a table and basically skyping on a big screen; the judge asked some questions and after my turn was over addressed a doctor by speaker phone that worked for social security about my file. Apparently this doctor’s opinion was preferential over my physicians, who have dealt with my condition between 5 to 19 years and he basically discounted everything. The doctor even implied that I no longer had my condition because I wasn’t taking medications to control it? The judge gave my attorney a chance to offer a statement and he questioned the phone doctor something about calcium with sarcoidosis, which seemed unusual and irrelevant, but not being the expert in disability legality figured maybe I was missing something? The judge ordered a psyche evaluation even though he didn’t feel I needed it? Afterwards the attorney and I walked out of the building together and in a very casual demeanor he commented “I hope you thought I did alright.” I then questioned when I would know more about my case and why I would need a psyche evaluation; given my illness was physical? He actually responded he wasn’t sure? It was a total nightmare! After I returned home I was so upset I contacted my cousin from Arkansas to vent about the train wreck and wanting out from the deal. I was all new to attorney business but after talking to her boyfriend she assured me I didn’t have to retain him. After I got off the phone with her, I pulled my original contract to clarify any terms and was relieved I could fire him. I then proceeded to write a letter of termination to the attorney and send it certified. I didn’t feel the need to pursue further representation because it seemed mute and obvious that lawyers are clueless to health/illness and there was a major breakdown.
December 21, 2018 I had an appointment for the psyche evaluation; as a side note it was a very strange experience. The location was a big house with single lane driveway turned business? I drove around the surrounding blocks until I found a place with parking along the street. When I arrived the psych guy was in with a client and I had to wait awhile. As I was sitting in the main area, I could hear just about every word between the client and him. So much for privacy?
In order to gain some support, I decided I would finally contact the state representatives office that I had volunteered for in the previous campaign, that his campaign manager in a previous conversation had suggested regarding my situation. His office forwarded all the documents I provided and I received a notice back from them with a response from ssa indicating they already had the information? I couldn’t understand how that was possible because I had appointments in December following the dismissal of legal representation? It was expected to take 3 months for ssa to come to a decision in my case. Three months later I received notice for another hearing? I was thinking for what? I could not help but find this ridiculous and confusing. My supplemental hearing was on May 2, 2019 and as I anticipated; it did not disappointment for being pointless. Different judge, same skype channel. The judge proceeds to state that my previous judge had retired and he was assigned to the case for a decision. He indicated he had the opportunity to evaluate my records and felt he had a good understanding of the case. He then asked if I wanted to say anything? I replied I didn’t really understand why I would need another hearing and that my medical records should speak for themselves. I also mentioned I didn’t have any faith in the process and wasn’t sure what I could add. It made absolutely no sense. “Would you like to say anything?” About what? He was the judge that summoned me. If there was a particular reason for this hearing, shouldn’t he be the one asking questions based on the need and reason for the hearing. They literally could have called me on the phone to accomplish what occurred. Based on this hearing I found it crazy the judge even questioned why I didn’t have legal representation? Seriously, what am I missing because I feel as though I’ve been punk’d! As of this past week I received an unfavorable finding and the next step is requesting a review from the Appeals Council and waiting another 18 months for them to spiritually assault me; causing stress and preventing any healing.
I have this annoying innate desire in me to create order out of chaos, just like Christ, so I’ve learned from the best. It would be a bonus if God could move it to change. For now I can just have faith He will use this situation for His glory. I just wish I knew why I get all the dirty jobs? 😉 Of course it could always be worse and I could be a politician. The following paragraphs are my response’ to the unfavorable findings explanation, and what I discern as “gas lighting” .
I received notice of an unfavorable decision for social security disability and I don’t have any other choice but to request a review by the Appeals Council. I find it suspect that the documentation in the conclusion of findings was missing the most severe diagnosis’ I have been afflicted with since 2015, despite confirmation of receiving these records from my Hematologist at OSF and Urologist at Loyola; which documented Secondary Immune Deficiency, ITP, and Chronic Kidney disease. Also, my official diagnosis is systemic neurosarcoidosis and the MRI confirms this diagnosis, so the administrations qualifying diagnosis and assessment of sarcoidosis is incorrect; it disregards actual diagnosis completely. The evidence clearly proves my systemic involvement and is proven beyond any doubt, based on the multiple organs involved. I am in complete dismay how the findings could realistically come to the conclusion otherwise and that my case be deemed not severe or systemic? I have several specialist’ that have been involved in my care that include; endocrinology, urology, hematology, pulmonary, and last but not least neurology, which is a good indication my condition is systemic and severe. I’d suggest a credible doctor be deciding on this matter because the findings in my determination contradict the truth. Basic anatomy confirms these systems work together and how the nervous system is the operations manager. Maybe this is why judges shouldn’t be making determinations on health issues and that doctors familiar with the patients case should not be disregarded. The mere fact that more weight was given to an assigned doctor, who has never seen me, performed an examination, and based solely off of potentially transposed information, is completely dishonest and opposite of evidence based. Another contradiction to the findings was that the doctor on the phone watched? Afterwards? How would that add any insight? I’m apparently guilty of being too hot for illness? LOL In addition, the agency doctor proved he is unreliable by statements violating the oath a doctor takes “To do no harm.” Therefore his opinions cannot be used in good faith or trusted. The administration process is completely flawed, as with most things run by the government. To state there is no evidence that would suggest my condition is systemic; defies all logic and evidence.
systemic
[sis-tem´ik] pertaining to or affecting the body as a whole. systemic disease one affecting a number of tissues that perform a common function.
My case is so sever and rare most physicians have much difficulty and seem very intimidated treating all the involvement. As a result I am passed around like a hot potato from specialist to specialist. In the coveted 15 minutes I’m allowed with my doctors, the typical response to my concerns are always ” It’s the sarcoidosis.” So I’m sent on my way to deal. It is why I have been left with no choice but to go the distance over the course of my illness. It is also why I was forced to become my own advocate and be very selective in health care decisions. The worst of my dysfunctions involve the nervous system, which is essential for complete body function, an immune system that was created to defend the body from unseen microorganisms seeking to call our bodies home, and finally, chronic kidney stones leading to 10 kidney surgeries within the past 10 years causing kidney scarring and damage. If that wasn’t enough, chronic splenomegaly that had been repeatedly acknowledged in pet scan, and the multiple ultrasounds provided, acquired immune deficiency, I.T.P., residual brain lesions causing episodic dysphasia and documented nystagmus resulting in vision limitations; which possibly contribute to the unexpected balance disturbance I encounter on occasion. The lung scarring becomes apparent when afflicted with a rhino/retro virus; causing mucus drainage into the lungs, stimulating uncontrollable and convulsive coughing spells; that result alternating between vomiting and urine leakage. The coughing is triggered so deeply it feels as if you are drowning in mucus and left gasping for air. It’s humiliating, exhausting, and you prefer to avoid putting on a show to any bystanders. It happens more often than not; in fact I’ve currently been sick with a virus since my last hematology appointment, which is no surprise given the environment and being surrounded by other immune suppressed individuals carrying underlying infections. Doctors office’ are the last place you want to be when immune compromised. The consequence of having immune deficiency and getting sick results with an average 6 to 8 weeks before achieving symptom resolution. I have used a journal to document my health the last few years to better realize the impact, because after dealing with dysfunction for an extended period of time, it somehow becomes normal with a tendency to produce denial. Sometimes I wish I could record the ugly episodes that come with this condition, however, I have enough respect for myself and others to not want to torture anyone. I only share things that I can dress up; like kidney stones. After assessment of my journal documentation during the previous Dec-May, 78 of 182 days were bad involving additional ailments or virus’. Almost half of my life is spent sick with acute illness on top of chronic illness. To expect me to compete with healthy individuals is not only unfair but cruel! I’m at such a loss and feel attacked by all the inaccurate and incomplete findings. It was confirmed by the judge of receipt of the evidence, yet has been completely overlooked or missing from the finding evaluation. Not only have I been engaged in a physical battle over 25 years, but I would be an emotional basket case if it weren’t for my strong faith, intentional living, and believing in hope for better days. It shouldn’t be a surprise that through this process I would be dealing with mild anxiety and depression; due to being continuously forced to reflect on the last 4 years of illness and stuck in a system that prevents me from moving forward. To have a standard in the law where age is even a determining factor for disability, isn’t even rational but certainly explains ignorant comments such as “You’re too young to be sick?” Disability does not discriminate and inflammation is part of the aging process. Despite appearance’ my body has been in a chronic inflammatory state, aging at twice the rate for over 25 years. It is well documented that an additional year can be added to every year dealing with inflammatory conditions because inflammation is resistance. Medications don’t eliminate inflammation completely and at best only reduce it. Another suspect criteria used in the determination of disability is being on medications for treatment? Apparently according to ssa laws the more medication needed the more support for disability? This qualifying standard has got to be the most irrational concept of all. It literally reveals that medications are completely worthless for improvement of illness. If you were taking medications for a condition and it improved the condition and quality of life, you wouldn’t need disability! Talk about an oxymoron!
I have been held hostage by the social security administration after working approximately 29 years and 22 of those years under the influence of illness and chemotherapy/immune suppression. During those years I worked an average 30 hour work week, accompanied by 4 medical leaves annually the previous 5 years, while employed. The audacity of the statement claiming that I have worked 20 years with my condition; omits the obvious lack in understanding of progression of disease. It would be like stating because you have driven a vehicle for 20 years, there would be no reason it would break down and not perform. By that standard why would there ever be a need to retire? In fact, aging is similar to biologic mileage and anything working against the body, such as chronic illness, inflammation, or other factors add additional mileage. There are plenty of people much older that have much greater stamina, capabilities, and quality of life than those younger with ailments. Donald Trump is a great example. I have got nothing on him, or at least anything he would want. 😉
Nothing changes if nothing changes. The only change that has occurred with my health situation over the last 4 years, has been the elimination of working and the difference it has made; allowing isolation; minimal stress, illness, and hospitalizations. It is basic cause/effect. The stress response is a major assault on an already overextended body. It is a vicious cycle that cannot be escaped with any significant burden of effort. As it currently stands, my task limitations are confined to periods not exceeding 1.5 hours because of increased pressure to the brain; resulting in unexplained numbness,tingling,burning, cramping in extremities and dizziness. I push myself to achieve basic tasks and feel grateful for good days when I am able to accomplish a couple basic items on my to do list. This whole process has been ridiculous; as if someone who understands law could ever understand the body, health, and the cost of illness? I shouldn’t have to seek legal assistance in pursuit of an earned benefit, defending my reality; especially by someone who is clueless regarding matters of illness and disease. The fact I have not earned any substantial income in over 2 years despite my best efforts is evidence I have been unable to commit to steady employment. Once again a personal opinion has more value than evidence. I welcome further advise on all the positions I would be suited to perform that were claimed in the findings. Have job requirements gotten so mediocre they are no longer competitive? Attendance optional? Dependability not required? Both sedentary and repetitive motion are both factors that can trigger inflammation and cause further damage to an already compromised body. I can’t type worth anything with any consistent manner due to hand/eye coordination disturbance’ from nystagmus. I refuse to perform at a level that is unacceptable by most standards. I guess that is where the world and I collide? I value the work and effort I can provide and currently all that I have to offer is interrupted. I probably would make a really good editor if it weren’t for the unreliability associated with my circumstance’ and needing to avoid contact with hidden microbial enemies. I fought to work for 22 years with chronic illness and now fighting to rest and heal, and my body is worn out from this fight to save my soul.
The document findings are filled with inaccuracy’ and incomplete. I have followed with corrections to the findings report.
June 1, 2015 (6F/126) I had an appointment for zometa infusion for treatment of high calcium; not sarcoidosis. Zometa is a sodium bisphosphonate and isn’t used to treat sarcoidosis. (Incorrect ASSUMPTION)
June 26, 2015 (6F/126) “Reported not feeling well”? I had been having fevers with heaviness in my chest that hadn’t improved post contracting influenza b on April 7, 2015. Being a Friday after hours my provider sent me to the ER department after contacting him, to have my white count checked and if needed, boost it, which resulted with a white count of 1. The er doctor only offered me an antibiotic with no evidence of a bacterial infection. I refused the antibiotic knowing it was most likely viral and related to my influenza that never resolved. The er doctor, not familiar with my complex case, bullied me and refused to treat my white count as customary with neulasta, which was the reason my physician recommended I go in the first place. I wasn’t in any position to risk further complications from something unnecessary, so I determined waiting to see my physician the following Monday was the best decision. On June 29, 2015 I was appropriately diagnosed with neutropenic fevers, pneumonia, and hospitalized. (So again findings were not completely accurate and taken out of context.)
August 4, 2015 I saw my endocrinologist who had been following my persistent hypercalcemia and hypothyroid. The zometa treatments worked to decrease my calcium, which was later discovered to be related to a parathyroid adenoma.
October 7, 2015 I had a follow up visit with my pulmonary physician to evaluate resolution of pneumonia. I felt my lungs were stable and my cough had improved. (The assumption that zometa is used in the treatment of sarcoidosis is again false and shows complete medical ignorance.)
November 2, 2015 (6F/59) Living alone and being primarily independent and able to provide for basic self care needs is very different than trying to maintain consistent reliability. In fact, it should explain that maintaining necessary tasks on your own would place more demands on the body; without having a regular source of support. As if it is impossible to live alone with a disabling condition is another poor assumption. I’m not paralyzed, however, even if I were, there is no reasons that would prevent adjusting to the circumstance. This implication insults the disabled and shows contempt. It also does not mean I am without regular assistance at times. My neighbors are constantly looking out for me and lending a helping hand. They have been mowing my lawn for the last 9 years and have also delivered food on occasion. I have an uncle and aunt locally who take turns helping when needed in a variety of ways. People in my situation need what independence they can get to prevent further suffering from guilt and feeling like a burden.
December 1, 2015 According to my records I didn’t see my urologist on this date? So once again misinformation on reporting. Although I have a very active history with kidney stones and surgeries that started in July 2009. To date I have had at least 10 surgeries since 2009 to remove stones including; 3 cystoscopy, 5 percutaneous nephrolithotomy’, bilateral nephrolithotomy (2014), and most recently uteroscopy on December 5, 2017. I continue to produce many stones despite having my kidneys cleared over and over. My most recent ultrasound/scan was January 9, 2018 showing multiple stones and mild right side hydronephrosis. My calcium levels have remained normal since the parathyroid surgery on December 16, 2015, yet I continue to produce regular stone formations.
Completely eliminated from the findings and distorted was the events with I.T.P. I contacted my hematologist to order blood labs on November 2, 2015 after noticing petechiae. My platelet count was found to be 0 and I was hospitalized November 2, 2015 thru November 10, 2015 for a bone marrow biopsy, platelet transfusions, treated with IVIG, and followed up with rituximab for 6 weeks. By February 22, 2016 my platelets increased to 103 and remained fairly stable for my situation; averaging around 100. At most recent appointment on May 22, 2019 they were 94 which is still low, however, acceptable given my history that has been resistant to increase.
I. T. P. @ OSF Saint Anthony
Most of the month of December 2015 was spent at Mayo clinic evaluating my severe and complicated issues with adverse reactions and resistance to medications, to determine if there were additional options in the event rituximab failed to improve my platelets. January 25, 2016 Once again resumed the habit of passing more kidney stones on a fairly regular basis, despite normal calcium levels. Doctors have failed to advise of any treatment for this manifestation and continue to promote drinking more water; which I remain conscience of with no impact.
March 17, 2016 Had appointment with an allergist to further diagnose reactions with multiple medications, to determine alternate treatment options in my complex case. My seasonal allergy complaints were the least of my problems as I tolerate them by being proactive and trying to avoid triggers. Comparing seasonal allergies with drug allergies is irrational and there is no comparison. Doctors don’t prescribe mold or tree pollen and you don’t die from them either. It was determined I had significant abnormalities with polymorphism’, which also explained the severe reaction developed to prednisone, including seizures and worsening of condition when trying to decrease very aggressive doses in 2007, while treating optic neuritis. They had previously prescribed methotrexate and remicade in order to discontinue 14+ years of high dose prednisone and relieve an accumulated 4 years of cushing syndrome.
March 17, 2016 Misrepresentation with ” the claimant reported experiencing side effects from medications.” Polymorphism and adverse reactions are not insignificant “side effects” but rather life threatening. The report was clearly included in the documentation from the allergist at Mayo clinic and was explained. It has been a miracle surviving a-plastic anemia in 2013 and my immune system has never recovered to a substantial defensive capacity and continues to progressively worsen with additional microbial assaults. I suggest a lesson in pharmacology would be necessary to make a determination.
March 2016 I had started to feel better enough to explore trying to work again. I naively started searching for different employment options. I had a couple interviews during a period of about 6 months with no results, so July 2016 I decided to become an independent distributor for the Juice Plus company; understanding the value of whole nutrition and the health benefits it provided. In addition, I hoped I could earn some income too. I have remained a distributor but have failed to obtain legitimate earnings and continue to hope I will eventually reap some financial rewards for my efforts. I also have been open and continue seeking other opportunities for home based work with residual income that can accommodate my quickly changing and unpredictable body, while avoiding stress and deadlines that further trigger immune exacerbation.
April 15, 2016 I wasn’t having any life threatening issues, therefore did not require any medication involvement to solve detrimental symptoms. I had decided to start seeking alternative methods of healing based on evidence, instead of the same approach that lead to running out of FMLA and losing my job. It is completely false I denied all treatments; as the only treatments that were suggested were for future exacerbation. Medications have failed me and left me in a desperate situation with my health. It is a complete fabrication that I denied any treatment options as noted April 15, 2016 (6F/23). I did not refuse all treatments, I exhausted the use of many medications after they no longer improved my condition. I refused further immune suppression because I am not insane. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. Medications work temporary at best. It would be further assault to my health to add immune suppression to an already severely suppressed immune system. Furthermore immune suppression does not remove scar tissue or address the multiple issues such as kidney stones; it would be adding insult to injury. I have been trying to resurrect my immune system since losing my employment in 2015 with no success at this point. Over twenty two years of chemo medications have done what they were designed to do, while never preventing the many hospitalizations and even multiplying the problems. The only answer the medical community has for my condition is immune suppression, which goes against biologic science and sanity. The world is so conditioned to believe a pill is the answer for everything and disregards root cause, complications, or risks. Sarcoidosis is not something you treat, it is the life threatening symptoms that are treated. The ignorance of this disease does not go unnoticed.
August 1, 2016 As typical I passed one of the many kidney stones in my history that never involved the ER. Emergency rooms are for emergencies. Based on the amount of kidney stones I have passed, it no longer constitutes an emergency and proves a foolish use of resource. Newsflash…… when you are passing a kidney stone the pain can be so intense you can’t even leave your bed, let alone the house. Furthermore there is nothing the ER can do besides charge outrageous fees and hand out pain medication like candy. With experience comes knowledge and you learn how to cope. Applying peppermint oil topically and laying flat has been my approach to tolerating the pain that is triggered by stone movement. You also develop a very high pain tolerance with experience. Pain medication will only cause additional concerns; see any drug information profile. Maybe I need to provide all the picture documentation of several of the kidney stones passed these last few years; since without visual reference it’s easy to ignore? I imagine people think I am crazy for collecting these kidney stone events, however, it seems to be the only way to get the message across about the problem.
August 12, 2016 it was reported as being asymptomatic and I’m wondering of which multiple issue? I certainly wasn’t kidney stone free or cured of ITP and Secondary Immune Deficiency during that period, or any other for that matter and all my medical records support this finding.
October 7, 2016 (6F/7) I have episodic breathing and cough that is dependent on a variety of factors; including environmental toxins and acute infections. Having various roaming health conditions that happen independently, do not exclude the continuous and persistent abnormalities. My overall condition is episodic in nature with varying degrees and impacted by nutrition, sleep, and stress avoidance; which are crucial to avoiding further immune triggers . Being proactive and choosing intentional behaviors has been a requirement for avoiding any major setbacks. Something as simple as a bug bite could create havoc in my body.
February 7,2017 (7F/24) There is clearly some confusion indicating treatment and improvement? Completely false and misleading, as far as nervous system involvement is concerned; that didn’t develop until later. September 1, 2017 my local neurologist ordered an MRI after an initial visit in August because of ongoing issues including; headaches,numbness and tingling in both feet, right arm, and burning in feet. She preferred to consult and partner with my neurologist at Loyola who had history with my situation but was farther away. A suitable treatment was eventually denied by insurance after several attempts to get it covered. I have been adjusting and dealing with the issues the best way possible with no source of income. I felt some benefit after several chiropractic treatments, however still experience these symptoms periodically upon exertion and am unable to sustain the treatments because of insufficient funds. As typical governments don’t understand budgets and that you can’t just steal service’ when broke. Something the government doesn’t seem to have a grasp on based on every area of waste,abuse, and debt.
March 9, 2017 (20F/45,58,73,114;22F) Although I was currently having minimal issues, there seems to be another misinterpretation regarding chronic illness? It has been status quo the last 4 years, so regardless of not having major life threatening symptoms, I have remained immune suppressed and carrying kidney stones; causing degrees of nephrolithiosis . In what warped reality is “not worse” equivalent to “better”? Being able to prioritize sleep with inconsistent sleep patterns and avoiding stress has been an essential part of maintaining any further progression of disease. In addition, the notes were obviously wrong; it’s called human error. I was previously a pharmacy technician and maintained my license until its expiration in March 2017. It’s still not relevant to the current situation so apparently assumptions were made? I haven’t worked as a pharmacy technician since being released from my employment September 27, 2015. The IRS can affirm this fact.
March 23, 2017 My body decided to start attacking and the target was iron deficiency; a 6 week course of iron infusions were initiated.
September 1, 2017 As stated previously, this was the beginning of increased nervous system involvement and treatment eventually being denied. Neurologist ordered MRI after initial visit in August because of ongoing issues including; headaches,numbness and tingling in feet, right arm, and burning in feet. She preferred partnering with my Neurologist at Loyola who had more history with my situation but was farther away. A suitable treatment was eventually denied by insurance after several attempts to get it covered. I have been adjusting and dealing with the issues the best way possible with no source of income. Not working has been part of the necessary adjustment.
November 22,2017 After preparing for bed and bathing I had an episode similar to previous experience’ with seizures. I became concerned enough to investigate if the noted brain lesions 2 months prior were getting worse, due to inability to access treatment, so I went to the ER for assessment.
January 9, 2018 Better is very subjective when dealing with the spectrum of ailments involved with my condition. Of course I felt better after my uteroscopy; it relieved pressure from nephrolithiosis and stone blockage of urine. I didn’t feel the amount of pain resorted to a strong opioid medication and was able to utilize tylenol to tolerate pain. I have earned a high pain tolerance!
If medical evidence does not support my disability it is because of failures on those assessing them and it was either ignored or misrepresented. Based on all the discrepancy I found in the findings, it explains human error, unrealistic standards, or malice. Knowing individuals much younger, healthier, and able to work that have been collecting disability, while I am denied despite the abundant evidence is insulting and demeaning. I have been dealing with a chronic illness marathon for over 25 years. Income is required to pursue any serious attempt of improvement with functional medicine. If there was even minimal effort to understand the severity of my condition, it should be obvious. I most likely won’t even reach standard retirement age. The government has no business making claims I am able to do something when reality and facts prove otherwise. I want to work again but that can’t happen until I get resolve of major health issues. I am a motivated person at the mercy of my body and shouldn’t be at the mercy of the government too. The inconsistency involved with this process is just another example of ineffective government and also explains the ignorance associated with illness and health care. This decision also affirms I made the right decision ending my legal representation. Talk about manipulation of facts and inaccuracy. Another incorrect documentation was in regards to my representation. At my initial hearing I was represented by Andrew Locke and not James Greeman, as reported in the findings summary. Details matter in this process. The deficiency’s in this determination prove to be sloppy. Taking events out of the context numerous times distorts the entire picture and is dishonest. This only covers the cliff notes of my journey with neurosarcoidosis too.
Government corruption runs deep and includes the social security administration. I certainly feel as though I am in a similar position as Donald Trump with the Mueller investigation and can relate to the similarities of this corrupt government process. The social security nazi’s need to be exposed and drained! It should be a private entity owned by “We the People”. It’s obvious the government can’t be trusted and why legal assistance is necessary for this process. Leave it to me to always have to learn the hard way and take the most difficult road. The government will probably be the death of me but can only hope it will be used by God for His purpose. Maybe they need to reevaluate my psyche evaluation because apparently I’m delusional to believe that my condition is severe and prevents gainful employment? Apparently I just identify with my symptoms but shouldn’t that be enough? Seems to me transgender people have more rights than the chronically ill. I guess it shouldn’t be a surprise given how backwards and insane our society has become. Heaven help me because there is no place like home and I don’t seem to fit in this world anywhere. I need an intervention and a second chance at life again. I have had several people tell me I should write a book and after this, I feel I just might have written a chapter and closer to that reality.
Besides all of this evidence SS has a horrible rate of return on investment. You’d be a LOT better off investing that money in a 401K or IRA or other investment. Plus if you should die you can will that investment to your adult children or other family. With SS all that investment is GONE!!!! On top of that the government can change the terms of how much and when you can get your money out by reducing benefits, changing retirement age, etc, etc. And if you could use that cash for some emergency, you CANNOT get access to it unlike a retirement account. These are only FOUR of many reasons SS is a horrible investment for the future!
And So It Begins the fear mongering and conditioning.
I get so tired of the propaganda, fear mongering, and misinformation surrounding the safety of vaccines while so easily conforming to the worldly practices. I am very passionate about human biology, research, and believe God assigned me to work in pharmacy for nearly 15 years for a reason. God created our immune system for survival and is the One who ultimately decides when our time is finished here on earth. I want to encourage more initiative of understanding the God given miracle we have been given access and decrease blind faith in pharmakeia aka witchcraft.
We are sicker than ever as a society and the reasons become obvious when you actually understand the problems and apply the wisdom of the Lord. If you weren’t familiar with the term iatrogenic death, you had been missing a major concern and danger to your well being. In addition the terms “dirty genes” or “epigenetics” should mean something to you. We are being killed by idolatry of medicine. Our society arrogantly believes men in white coats and scientists know more about our bodies and can protect us better than our Awesome God. I know through experience this is not the case and Christ is faithful. Listen, I get it because it took me over 22 years of the conventional path and losing everything to be emptied and finally discover my devotion and determination to seeking something different. I have survived influenza b, pneumonia, shingles, and M.A.C. lung disease, to name just a few things, all while immune suppressed. I have been living in bondage to medicine for over 25 years and on a slow path to finding true healing. It certainly hasn’t been easy and it can be discouraging how long it is taking for recovery. It is a constant battle against the mainstream indoctrination and conditioning, however, it also explains the necessary obstacles, time, and preparation that needed to occur on the journey to true heath in hopes of overcoming the world. I would never violate another person’s sovereign ability to choose their path; my goal is to educate and get people interested in empowering themselves with knowledge, to allow informed consent of their health. I also realize it is a lot to take in for the average person and why I feel it is my responsibility to be of service, document, and share for others, so it isn’t so daunting of a task.
Iatrogenic Death is the 3rd leading cause of death
The graphic here shows the majority of current live virus vaccines and the links to the package insert position that discusses shedding: http://www.immunize.org/packageinserts/
But does that REALLY happen? Yes. Yes it can and does as these studies illustrate:
Additionally, the Dtap/Tdap that is NOT live vaccine has been shown by the FDA to cause the vaccinated to become asymptomatic carriers whenever exposed to the bacteria for both pertussis and diphtheria, thus spreading the illness without knowing
You can also find that most medical facilities are aware of this. Johns Hopkins and St. Jude hospitals are just a few of many who post precautions for recently vaccinated visitors as pictured. Check out the chicken pox vaccine sign as well.
Fear can be an ultimate teacher if you are willing to learn from the best teacher; which is the Bible. Fear also reveals who or what we depend upon. The Bible’s teachings have so much to say about fear and none of it is good or something to answer to. Choose this day whom you will serve and I pray it will never start or end in fear.
Matthew 10:26 New Revised Standard Version (NRSV) Whom to Fear 26 “So have no fear of them; for nothing is covered up that will not be uncovered, and nothing secret that will not become known.
I often have this recurring thought, you don’t know what you don’t know. I know health because I know illness and my struggles have lead me on a journey to learning and incredible spiritual growth. I have also discovered health care has nothing to do with actual health and that the government should not have any control of the debacle; which they know nothing about. Not only did I work in “health care”, specifically pharmacy, for nearly 15 years, I have currently experienced the industry extensively for over 25 years dealing with my chronic illness. If it was effective I would not be sick for over half of my existence and experience the progression of disease, which has included Neurosarcoidosis,Primary Immune Deficiency, I.T.P, G.E.R.D, and C.O.P.D to diagnose parts of the multiplying dysfunctions. I have survived over 25 years of conventional medicine because I have boldly chosen to seek Christ and rely on faith to direct my decisions and it didn’t happen overnight or doing what was typical. From the beginning of my illness the treatments never made sense, however, like most people I had to learn the hard way. It took time and patience to break free from the status quo. Experience has always been the best teacher. If I had remained on the conventional medicine course I would be dead and I am not being over dramatic either. I can recall several critical moments, however, 2012 was when it became imperative the need to change course. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. Even now, still being severely immune suppressed the last 6 years, you recognize the miracle of living and the obvious understanding that God ultimately decides when our mission is accomplished and our earthly term is finished. Our unknowing is limitless and provides for a thirst for understanding. The Bible instructs that if you cling to life you will lose it and explains a lot about my journey. We are body and spirit, yet often forget how they are connected.
John 3:6 New International Version (NIV) 6 Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit[a] gives birth to spirit.
Mark 5:26 New International Version (NIV) 26 She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors and had spent all she had, yet instead of getting better she grew worse.
Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.
The first Biblical principle that has been ingrained is to try and honor my body as a temple. Nothing about medication honors our body and actually goes completely against it by manipulating the God given biologic chemistry. If you’ve ever read all the potential side effects for the common drugs and think there is anything life giving, you’ve been conditioned by the world. The author of death,stealing, and destruction is satan. You don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone; then you try and find it. We have inherited a mysterious and divine body upon birth. The Bible is the manual but we have been conditioned to believe it operates on auto pilot. Disease isn’t a random or unexplained occurrence; it’s just learning human biology hasn’t been a priority in society. Also ego likes to insist we don’t make mistakes. I have always had a passion for health but unfortunately or fortunately it took developing a chronic illness to become almost obsessed with understanding what is hidden. Since nearly approaching the 4th year anniversary of developing influenza b, that would become the ending of my employment and beginning of the unknown, it has been my mission to conquer my health and figure out how my current situation is part of a process and preparing for something more, that couldn’t be seen from where I was left. This world is filled with deception and nearsightedness. The Bible acts as spiritual glasses for clarity in a world filled with darkness. I’m constantly amazed how easily people ingest substances or foods despite potential consequences that apparently my body screams loudly to. Besides for my insight on endocrine disruptor’s and alcohol being in that category, I can’t think of a single advantage to drinking alcohol, in fact, just the opposite, it stimulates insulin in the body which in turn creates inflammation. I’ve learned that inflammation is my enemy!
” It can be extremely easy to live a life of comfort. A life in which the choices we make are made solely based on what is easiest, benefits us quickest, and is most convenient. Be assured that a life that is truly lived includes many of the following: bumps, laughter, bruises, joy, discomfort, success, heartache. Often times, where you want to be is not where you are called to be. Going where you are called is certainly not always pleasant or perfect but it is always beautiful and good.” ~Sidewalk Prophets 3/25/19#thesesimpletruthstour #swpfamily #beencouraged
Living with an invisible illness enlightens you to the major deception you must face living. The deception comes from everywhere and everyone; including many doctors. It requires having strong communication skills with an ability to convey symptoms that at times seem unusual, even peculiar, to those who have never lived it. The forsaken reality is, seeing is believing and not seeing is not believing. It is why I eventually started documenting my very unique, or as doctors remarked, my complex case. As I look back and read my medical records the gratitude sinks deeper of the strength and perseverance that has accompanied this battle which can’t be seen. The characteristics you obtain on this journey are priceless and the cost is great but the value is greater; which often seems unnoticed by the rest of the world sometimes. Invisible illness has revealed learning deeper truths in every area of life, but particularly the curiosity of the soul and it’s Creator.
I didn’t choose to quit working but after almost 15 years with my previous employer, I was released during a battle with my chronic illness. Apparently God decided I needed a time out after 22 years of pushing through health challenges. The current season has ended up being much longer than I ever imagined and at this point I’m not even sure of the duration or what lies ahead. The last 3 years have found me with no consistent income and waiting on approval of social security disability. I finally received a date for my hearing and recently had a phone interview with the attorney I found, in preparation for my hearing. The conversation with him left me with anxiety and insecurity because it reminded me of the shallow perception, discrimination, and lack of understanding the majority of people have regarding illness and health. Healthy people take so much for granted. It takes effort to live with a chronic illness; fighting for life daily. People are blind to what is unseen and it reveals how disconnected they are from our Creator, who cannot be seen. Chronic illness conditions you to live on a much deeper and spiritual level. It also reveals the Supernatural powers you depend on daily. Being intentional is a necessity. It takes a great deal of faith,skill, and determination to live with a life threatening disease and look as good as I do. 😉 All glory to Heaven and my Lord. Many times my mother has accused me of faking her out while sick, however, it is all grace and no act on my part. God makes illness look easy I guess?
#FakingWhileUnderSickness
Admittedly it can be easier to be perceived as normal when most of the world is either self focused and distracted or under the influence of stress, toxic foods, alcohol, or legalized medications. I am not in the habit of sharing details that could potentially be used against me at some point.The only people that are aware of my brain damage are my doctors and I think they have even forgotten because of time and appearance’ based on supernatural adaptation. Even my family has what I call as health trauma amnesia, because all they seem to recognize is what they currently see? It is not as if I share all the details of my illness or even should. Just this evening as I was vacuuming the rug in my living room by myself my brain was telling that I was brushing the floor. #BlameItOnAphasia #BrainLesionProblems It is moments like this that pop up unexpected on various occasions with no warning. Or all the times my nystagmus gets the best of me and I look like I’m intoxicated because I stumble when moving. These are just some of the daily reminders I am not completely able. It leaves me feeling ashamed knowing all those amazing talents I possess are wasted on others ignorance and expectations. Just as I am able to write this blog; it takes careful and methodical editing, persistence, and time; which the real world doesn’t seem to allow. I haven’t given up restoration or eventually earning passive income yet either, but in the mean time I need some financial stability to go further and obtain my goals.
I don’t want my illness to define me nor am I seeking sympathy either. I would prefer to be understood; which seems unlikely. As I mentioned previously, I’m grateful my impairments are not obvious; it’s hard enough dealing with the discrimination that is invisible. It is a battle that seems impossible to win, having people question your ability to work and ironically now why you aren’t. The power of perception is so fickle! I’m just too intelligent and good looking to be disabled apparently? Yet here I am killing it, even literally!
.Intelligence,personality, and beauty do not dictate a person’s ability to work, accomplish tasks, or follow through. These characteristics make for a desirable resume, but lack in productivity. Any source of income or employment requires consistency; which does not exist or even realistic when challenged with an unpredictable immune dysfunction. Besides the nervous system damage that has occurred, having an immune system that is incapable of protecting me from all the unseen environmental toxins and warfare leaves me sick at the drop of a dime, on top of the typical fatigue. Statistics state that an additional year of life is added to every year while ill. I am constantly being reminded of how good I look for being sick. I will be 46 next month and it has been just over 25 years dealing with my condition ,so that would make me 71; no wonder my body is ready for retirement. I look fabulous for 71! lol Then there are all the kidney stones and surgeries on a very regular basis I deal with. I eventually created a photo album on facebook to start documenting some of the ridiculous journey.
“When you examine the lives of the most influential people who have ever walked among us, you discover one thread that winds through them all. They have been aligned first with their spiritual nature and only then with their physical selves.” – Albert Einstein
Well as usual God speaks to my heart through my daily devotional:
” None of us are immune. Life is hard some days. And often there’s not even just one “big” thing, but just lots of little battles that can drain us dry. Parenting, marriage, job, relationships, fears, worries about the future, experiencing loss, discouragement, illness, money problems – it all can leave us beaten down and worn. But, praise God, He gives us one another to help in times when we just feel like, “I can’t anymore…”
“We’re all in this life thing together; let’s help each other today. Give an encouraging word, smile at someone, write a note, send a text, buy someone a coffee, pray for another soul and let them know that you’re praying, anything, just to remind a fellow believer that you’re holding up their battle-weary arms. And that you’re with them.”
And God is with us.
Dear God,
The battle feels intense some days. We get tired and weak,
weary and worn. It’s hard to keep going in the face of defeat. But help
us to remember that you will never leave us, that you’re our Refuge and
our Strength, an ever-present help in trouble. We know that the enemy
wouldn’t be fighting so hard against us, if we weren’t making a
difference for your Kingdom. He wouldn’t be trying so hard to stop us,
if he didn’t think you had so much good still in store. Remind us that
the battle belongs to you, and whatever we’re up against can be taken
down in one fail swoop by your Mighty Hand. Help us to trust you more,
to never waste time spinning our wheels and wrestling or fighting in our
strength. Please forgive us Lord for the times we’ve failed to lift our
hands to you, for the days we’ve forgotten to come to you first. Fill
us with the Power of your Holy Spirit
this day. Fill us with your joy, fill us with your wisdom and
discernment, fill us with constant reminders that Your Presence will go
with us, and you will give us rest.
Interview Questionnaire – Health Access Advocate
PLEASE TYPE YOUR RESPONSE TO THE FOLLOWING QUESTIONS
What motivates you to become involved with the IDF advocacy team?
My own health struggles and determination dealing with Neurosarcoidosis for nearly 25 years. You develop a spirit of overcoming and hope. I feel the universe has lead me to this opportunity and given me a significant position for transformation. I have always been driven for improvement and quality of health.
The most helpful skill for Health Access Advocates is the ability to tell a clear, concise story about your journey with PI. What past experience have you had with sharing your story?
I actually prefer writing as opposed to speaking as a result of insecurities associated with previous brain lesions causing aphasia and have written about some of my health journey in a blog.
What other special skills or experiences do you have that will enhance the efforts of our advocacy team?
Engaging genuinely with others, empathy, and a passion to make the world and people’s lives better.
Tell us about any IDF advocacy activities that you have participated in (action alerts, writing letters, testimony, advocacy days)?
At this point it is a very new direction in my life. I have just done much research in my own attempt to recover my life and have been blogging, however, not specific to IDF.
Can you describe a situation when someone disagreed with you and how you handled it?
I am an objective and respectful individual and usually have the approach to agree to disagree. Admittedly I have a tendency to avoid conflict but will not allow anyone to discredit me or others. It requires seeking God for grace, mercy, and letting go sometimes.
God continues to reveal and reinforce my mission of restoration with resource’,guidance, and affirmations on my journey to healing nearly 25 years of NeuroSarcoidosis. My focus has been seeking the Lord for truth and direction since I lost my job in the fall of 2015, as a result of discrimination and progression of my illness. Our Creator is the source of creation and healing. Our bodies were designed to be self healing and it is miraculous; the entire cells of our bodies regenerate at different daily,monthly, and yearly rates in a divine process known as autophagy.
System Autophagy
God has kept me very busy with online health material and health summits; in fact, there have been very few weeks not filled with at least one summit to view and gain further understanding. God has also been connecting me with many alternative and functional medical providers whom most have had their own journey to healing as a result of illness. Finally, God introduced me to the world of political activism as a result of the decline in care and increased cost; as a consequence of the implementation of Obamacare. I’ve been trying to put all the pieces together to form a specific vision and I believe I am closer than ever after the most recent series of influence. “The Healing Miracle Stem Cell Secrets” series is my current blessing sent from God. Health is a complicated process; many things can go wrong with our bodies and the worldly conventional medical community refuse’ to assess the entire picture. Health is a multidisciplinary issue. I realized it was broken from the beginning but until recently didn’t feel able to contribute a better way nor had any motivation. It is human nature to become comfortable and ignore things until they get extreme and awareness occurs. As usual and in God’s mysterious ways I now realize it has all been a blessing in disguise and part of Gods plan. Medication has never offered a solution but with my experience and most recent revelations obtained on my trips to Mayo clinic, it is apparent that medications are dangerous. It was by the grace of God that while searching for a table to sit in the cafeteria, Kelly motioned me over and invited me to join her. We connected very quickly and started sharing our similar issues with drug intolerance. She suggested blood testing for polymorphism gene expression and referred me to her allergist. He ordered the testing and provided me with additional information and it opened up the world of cytochrome P450 enzymes and their responsibility in metabolizing different medications. So besides for the usual drug allergies, which aren’t revealed until after exposure and reaction, the list of negatives is even greater. There has been a recent awareness of the growing epidemic of addiction to pain medications known as opioids in the news, however, it is the nature of all drugs to create dependency. It is why there remains a huge and profitable pharmaceutical industry and is based on basic biologic chemistry. Sadly most of society has been deceived and conditioned for instant gratification; seeking easy answers that simply do not exist. There are many hidden dangers taking prescriptions that the world seems to be blind to that should be exposed. Ignorance is only bliss to the intellectually lazy. Another problem is the blind trust of doctors who are also human with flaws. Most people do not even realize the fourth most common cause of death in the US is doctor prescribed medications and not even related to any prescription errors. I believe it is negligent to prescribe prescriptions without advance gene testing because everyone is unique and the consequence can lead to what is known as iatrogenic. i·at·ro·gen·ic /īˌatrəˈjenik/ adjective 1. relating to illness caused by medical examination or treatment: “drugs may cause side effects which can lead to iatrogenic disease”
I am fortunate that not only do I have an insatiable desire for learning and understanding but also practice disciplines that have helped me avoid addictive personality traits. It requires intentional and sacrificial living; being a glutton for punishment doesn’t hurt either? 😉 However, I can honestly say that I was chemically dependent on immune suppression and believe I am still dealing with withdraw issues and residual hormonal abnormalities, despite practicing fasting and detoxification principles for almost 2.5 years. It takes time to restore 22+ years of imbalance because of misguided behavior. I have faith that good things come to those who persevere and are patient; it requires a lot of seeking God’s word! I also realize that most of the information I am encountering are newer discoveries and in God’s perfect timing. At this point it is obvious that government and politics are the stumbling block to health. Insurance standards are rigid and limit payments for alternative treatments like massage,acupuncture,oxygen,reiki,natural supplements, and many other unconventional therapies that could provide relief. Furthermore, the government should not have the power to limit my ability to use my own cells in the pursuit of attempted healing. Consequently, stem cell therapy could potentially reduce associated healthcare costs. The current system perpetuates illness and requires continued error and practice. There is a great quote “If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.” Change needs to happen and it is our God given right to be able to choose and use whatever means necessary in our pursuits. God has been using my illness for the greater good. Not only did He want me to transform medicine but He assigned me a position working in pharmacy to experience and expose the dysfunction,idolatry, and evil that has progressively gotten worse the previous decade. He also used my position to prompt me to discontinue drugs and save myself. I am apparently a slow learner? LOL People have more faith in medicine and drugs than Christ and His ability to heal and restore. I have many stories of how God has miraculously kept me alive. Over 22+ years is a long time to be prescribed poisons that the government has deemed safe. Newsflash….. living can kill you in a variety of ways and government has no business being a guardian and false idol. I want my story to end with God being glorified and responsible for my life or death. John 11:4 English Standard Version (ESV) 4 But when Jesus heard it he said, “This illness does not lead to death. It is for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it.”
It has been obvious that God has always served a greater purpose in my life that is so beyond my understanding. It has taken nearly 3 years of complete focus and discernment on Him, health, and everything involved in the human body to bring me to this point of understanding. The most recent indication that I am close to the prize is receiving a connection request and message on facebook from a very well known prophetic minister after following him. His message was: “I add you up because i saw something great coming your way and i also saw spiritual attacks..i want you to bind them with prayers.” I’m including a youtube link to lesson 1 of the current series I am learning for those that actually care to discover the divine capabilities of our bodies. It is very unfortunate that many have become so passive in life and ignore the manual or Bible; which contains the power and guidance to healing. I just wish more science was actually used in the diagnosis and treatment of illness.
The year 2015 was a very significant beginning of correction and transformation in all areas of my life. It was the year that began a pattern of spiritual freedom that saved me from the stress girl I had become. Thanks to the movie “Old Fashioned” for introducing me to the label and allowing me similar reflections of past emotions regarding personal relationships. The movie pulled at my heart strings and somehow released the emotional baggage I had carried for 20 years upon ending my relationship with my ex fiance’ on 2/14/1995.
Almost two months after seeing the movie and following Easter on April 8,2015, I developed influenza b and was hospitalized for 8 days. I discovered that during my hospitalization my ex, whom I had remained in contact with on facebook, had deactivated his account. It turned out to be an unexpected blessing and divine action of God; removing old situations that kept me stuck in unhealthy energy patterns and impaired growth as a result of my confusion.
Next my employer denied extending my paid sick time and I was forced to return to work prematurely. About a week after returning to work on June 27th I found myself in the ER with a diagnosis of pneumonia; adding an additional 4 days in the hospital and way more recovery time. The consequence of 22 years of worldly conventional treatments that included immune suppression and chemo drugs exhausted my immune system and it turned out being a very slow recovery process. On October 2nd. I received notice by mail from my employer releasing me from my job, however, it would reveal another blessing in disguise. I had become dissatisfied working in a field that I eventually realized contradicted my values about real health and became complacent and stuck. I was now completely free to pursue my focus on my health and aggressive hypercalcemia that had plagued me the previous 5 years. I was finally scheduled for parathyroid surgery at Loyola, when I suddenly noticed unusual bleeding issues with petechiae on November 2nd.
Definition of petechia
plural petechiae play \pə-ˈtē-kē-ˌī\
: a minute reddish or purplish spot containing blood that appears in skin or mucous membrane as a result of localized hemorrhage
Arm with petechiae
I immediately contacted my hematologist at OSF to request lab work and my cousin from Downers Grove offered to visit and pick me up to take me to Rockford; she was interested in stopping by the courthouse in search of genealogy content. About 15 minutes after completing my blood draw and leaving OSF I received a call from a nurse indicating my counts were abnormal and requesting I return for repeat labs. I was curious and inquired what the platelet count indicated and was told 0; which was no surprise and why I had contacted my provider to begin with. I responded that I was still in Rockford and would return after the current stop. My repeat blood managed to reveal 1 platelet and my Dr admitted me to the hospital for another bone marrow biopsy and treatments with IVIG for another 4 days. My doctor was also kind enough to allow me to go to the cafeteria with my cousin to eat before registering since it was now after hospital food service hours. While in the hospital at OSF I was forced to cancel my scheduled parathyroid surgery at Loyola that week. In the mean time, I finally received notice from my nephrologist at Mayo clinic for a follow-up appointment scheduled for December 5th. During the month of December my nephrologist was also able to refer and obtain additional appointments with several other specialists that included; endocrinology, hematology, rheumatology, gastroenterology, and eventually even a surgeon. I was assigned parathyroid surgery on December 16th which finally resolved my excessive calcium issues. Another bonus was I was able to decline any pain medication and maintained pain control with extra strength Tylenol and Jesus after surgery.
Goodbye employment,income, and the stress that encompassed my job! Goodbye heart baggage, former best friend and ex!
What a wild ride it has been living with sarcoidosis, however, I am able to examine how this disease has actually saved me from myself in many ways. After the realization of misguided medicine; resulting in progressive damage, the following action steps have been continual education,correction,healing, and attempted restoration of true health. I have even spent the last 2.5 years intermittent fasting and been able to reverse secondary hypothyroid as of my last visit with my endocrinologist and testing in October.
I have gained so much knowledge and understanding about the human body, immune system, and nervous system that I believe I have potentially discovered the reason for developing my “auto-immune” issues and the connection to my hyperactive nervous system also; despite the conventional medical community stating it isn’t understood. The last 3 years revealed a term for this strange ability I had with energy that I had brushed off as just being a freak; which is also known as being an empath. I have always believed that nothing happens randomly and the more soul searching, investigating, and analyzing I do the more I cannot help but speculate the possibility that sarcoidosis was a physical manifestation of my subconscious; preventing marriage or the universe changing the direction of my life? I mean, 6 weeks after I became engaged I suddenly became seriously ill? Talk about the significance of timing!
To be continued finally! After the realization of being stuck in life and love I am able to embrace my inner heart; it started with sarcoidosis, searching, and divine intervention. God truly does create good out of the bad.
It has truly caught me by surprise in some ways, as I explore unfamiliar territory. It can be scary experiencing desires after denying them in varying degrees for the previous 20+ years. Most recently I have noticed a spiritual shift of peace, despite being emptied completely. It took losing most everything physically to allow space in my soul to fill as a result of finally having complete focus on God and His leading with no worldly distractions. I truly feel as if I have found my inner child again. I didn’t remember the exact date of my engagement, I just knew it was around the Fourth of July. After it was announced that the movie “Sleepless In Seattle” was celebrating the 25th anniversary; which I had seen with Nate at a theater in Mobile,Alabama during that engagement trip, I was inspired to dig into my time capsule and explore my past so I could finally release it. So July 2nd. marks the 25 year anniversary of my engagement and it feels significant to my current journey and recent spiritual revelations. Plus I have always been convinced that God is a very calculated planner and there are significant numbers revealed in the divine realm. It just so happens that 25 is 2+5= 7 and even the Bible has provided evidence of 7 being divine.
I received my daily devotion @NeilVermillion for today and am sharing it for confirmation of God’s obvious communication and involvement in my current journey.
#DailyPropheticWord
In this moment I am not only moving you into brand new directions, but adding to the experience you already possess. I am taking core habits and practices and adding additional insights and understanding so you will see innovations and adjustments you could not see in the past. I am expanding what you know already. I am expanding what you are already able to do. I am capitalizing on your existing base of knowledge base as I continue to make it deeper.
With this in mind, do not look to the horizon of tomorrow with expectations of new things to be given, for much of what you will experience in this present season will not be new, but will be a reintroduction and reiteration of what you already know. Look to the same and familiar routine acknowledging its value, knowing it serves its purpose, but also that it is giving birth to new understanding by means of new interpretation.
Remain sensitive and alert in the day to day activities of your calling, for I am highlighting small and incremental changes that will open up new conversations and new applications. In these new adjustments you will surely come to learn what you could not, or did not, learn in your past. I am working with you this day to empower you to observe what you could not see before, even though it was already there.
I am giving you brand new revelation, as well as additional depth to existing revelation. Both will be needed and both will be given, so that you will lack nothing that is essential. You will acquire, process, and understand all you need, including interpretation and discernment for today, as well as a heightened awareness and understanding for tomorrow.
As you remain faithful over the course of time you will see it come to pass, the fulfillment of your heart’s desires. You will see how each day is significant in its value and its progression. You will perceive the value and appreciate its worth, for in all these things you will advance, and will surely acquire and accomplish all I have intended for you.”
So despite all the challenges and loss I have experienced in the past 3 years I have experienced expansion and fullness of my heart! Now onto the expectation of complete physical healing!
You haven’t lived until you have had a “Sanford and Son” moment; “Grandpa I’m coming to join you.” and I’ve had several dealing with sarcoidosis for over 24 years. Fasting lesson learned; carbonation can kill when you have GERD damage and have been abstaining from food for over 24 hours. I have practiced intermittent fasting for about two years and usually avoid carbonation, so this was a fail and valuable lesson. #Eat2Live not #Live2Eat I suppose it could have been the works of a sarcoidosis demon, however, I have obsessed about God and the divine human creation enough to recognize that air builds up from stomach acid and will escape into the esophagus when your stomach flap is broken and does not shut (also known as gerd). If it builds up enough it will block breathing airways by forming a barrier of gases, until it is released. I was lying awake in my bed and all of a sudden I started gasping trying to take in air with no success. Internal suffocation released……. and ER visit avoided. First thing I did was grab the bottle of peppermint oil on my night stand and inhaled both nostrils; I then went to the kitchen and took a sip of ice tea from my refrigerator and VOILA…. a cascade of gas escapes like a waterfall. I hate to seem preachy but i have been conditioned to be a problem solver and purpose driven. If everyone invested in understanding God and our physical bodies, the natural result would naturally be reduced health care costs. It can be irritating to watch so many people take their health for granted and live as if we are entitled to health; there would be no illness if that were the case. Medicine is NOT one size fits all and neither are our bodies. When you realize how much you are truly Loved by Christ your desire becomes to protect your divine assets, so you are able to perform at your best. Despite how hard I try, I can’t help but feel like such a failure sometimes because of my afflictions. Yet because of them I experience even more Love from my Savior. Sarcoidosis brings out the best in me and it is Christ. Thank you Lord for all the overtime work! Most conventional medicine is quackery and goes against the divine design. Ignorance is not bliss, it can destroy. There is a reason Natural/Holistic practitioners are referred to as Functional Medicine Doctors because the alternate is dysfunction. My intent is not to bash regular physicians because I don’t believe it is intentional; just deception that runs very deep in the broken medical culture. I also believe that modern medicine has become a false idol. Special thanks to my Heavenly Father, Dad who referred me to Robert Scott Bell and the ripple affect beyond to a plethora of holistic Dr.s actually giving tools to fix problems and heal the way God intended and designed us all. Mock away because I am a living and breathing sacrifice and miracle. So I boast in my weakness! What doesn’t kill you definitely makes you wiser and stronger through Christ.
shineb4 