Political Idolatry

I will admit after all the nastiness that I witnessed from Donald Trump during the Presidential campaign, against the man that God had motivated me to support; I was not a fan. However, I am so thankful that I trust Christ and He is in control when I have been deceived by the liberal media and my own deceptive eyes. It reminds me of the scripture:
2 Corinthians 5:7 “We live by believing and not by seeing.”
Glasses are the perfect symbol that our eyes have limitations; too many people trust and focus on them. Some of the most insightful people have been blind and it is because Faith is the only option in their world. So I am so grateful when life turns out differently than I expected! God knows me so much better than I even know myself.
Politics sure does bring out the true colors and lack of faith in peoples behavior. Everybody hates politics and it has become taboo to post or talk about it on social media; in return people don’t have a clue about what is actually going on in the government, which should be for the people and by the people. Government is involved in so many areas of our existence and yet the majority bury their heads in the sand. The reality of ignorance and hate of politics has been in the spotlight and it isn’t coming from Trump or the Conservatives. Liberal Democrats suddenly have amnesia and are fighting him over the same policies his predecessor’s had. I have never witnessed such vitriol from the left and the extreme of right and wrong and good vs. evil is playing out as the Bible has indicated. The above image could replace God for Conservative behaviors and Satan for Liberal behaviors and would be accurate. Actions speak volumes when you aren’t spiritually deaf.
Of course there will be those that claim you cannot judge all democrats or conservatives by their label categories but I disagree? I mean can you judge all KKK members by their ideology? Who would continue to support and be associated with an organization that did not represent their values? I simply can’t; my soul and character is a priority and so is my conscience. The Bible references scripture to “guard our heart.” The proof is in the results! I can’t help but see throughout life 2 distinctive ideologies in life. It is impossible to serve two masters; so you either submit, honor, and live accordingly to the Bible and Gods Word or you live the opposite. If you apply eternity to the equation; people will either go to heaven or hell. There is no place in between and the spirit and physical collide here on earth; it is only after death that they separate. I’m just glad life has crushed my physical body aka flesh, pride and allowed my spirit to soar beyond the carnal in the world. I think life is actually pretty simplistic if you are able to ignore all the noise and distractions that Satan places in our tracks.
The current political environment has also exposed a vast amount of what I call “Christians In Name Only” and have shown insurmountable hate from a bunch of frauds that believe they are right with God; they can roll scripture off their tongue all while spewing verbal venom at the drop of a post.
“Thou Shall Not Steal” goes far beyond the physical; it most certainly applies to the spiritual; stealing opportunity, experience, peace, and joy, are all wrong by Gods standard. People think nothing of the intention of their words and the motivation of their sick hearts. It sure does reveal a persons true nature to those inclined by the spiritual. If you aren’t able to recognize the human spirit, it’s impossible to witness the Holy Spirit since that isn’t visible to the eyes? Again, it really does separate the sheep from the wolves in society. We have a major theft problem in society presently and it is a symptom of Satan!

If I hear more garbage about Russia interfering with the elections I think I could scream; the shear insanity! More than 50% of voters didn’t want Hillary Clinton as President either but the Democrat party is now the party of denial and demons apparently? I didn’t vote for Trump, however, if there was a re-vote I would in a heart beat. God is Sovereign and He has allowed Trump to lead our country; that is reality!

Romans 13:1-5New Living Translation (NLT)
Respect for Authority

13 Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God. 2 So anyone who rebels against authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and they will be punished. 3 For the authorities do not strike fear in people who are doing right, but in those who are doing wrong. Would you like to live without fear of the authorities? Do what is right, and they will honor you. 4 The authorities are God’s servants, sent for your good. But if you are doing wrong, of course you should be afraid, for they have the power to punish you. They are God’s servants, sent for the very purpose of punishing those who do what is wrong. 5 So you must submit to them, not only to avoid punishment, but also to keep a clear conscience.

Too many people deny God’s power and authority. Government has become a false idol and government has become a tool for Satan.
“But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they never stop producing fruit.
Jeremiah 17:7-8 NLT
It all just continues to break my heart. The world needs truth and Jesus in politics again; so I try to be a small voice of sanity and thankful for the few steady politicians with integrity like Rand Paul, Mike Lee, Trey Gowdy, Ted Cruz, and locally Adam Kinzinger.


Bad Medicine

Life has seemed like a treasure hunt in pursuit of pieces to the health puzzle I have sought over the last 23+ years hoping to regain my health. I think I first need to add a disclaimer; the intention of this post isn’t to insult doctors because I have great respect for my providers, albeit they seem to be confined to the book of “one size fits all” answers? My goal would be to expose the flaws in the broken system and transform health as God has intended, because He is a healer! What happened to individualized medicine? The world has sucked in medicine, just like everything else!
I guess I thought seeking care at a facility based on Christianity; where the slogan was “we treat the human spirit” might involve seeking the Creator and Holy Spirit for guidance? Not only did it not seem the case; I actually had to argue many times about wasteful tests before procedures; like pregnancy, because apparently I couldn’t possibly be single,over 30, and celibate living in society by the worlds standard? Why would I lie about my standard of faith? I guess the question should be, why do so many not own their life? Of course, I do have a past, but fortunately I have learned from those mistakes and Sarcoidosis has taught me. When you have a chronic illness you no longer have a choice but to submit to wisdom.
Another contradiction, I thought medicine was suppose to be a science? I have found very little science in the broken system as I have tried to scale it. Science would actually test for the specific microorganism causing illness; whether bacteria,viral,fungal, or parasite. If the intention is to treat or cure a condition with a medication it shouldn’t be potentially worthless. In addition, those treatments can come with horrible consequences’ to the magnificent human machine God created. Logic explains in order to heal or cure an illness, the cause must be addressed. I can’t help but compare a vehicle to the human body; if the car didn’t start would you just add gas or oil and hope it starts? LOL Of course not! So why is this an acceptable norm in medicine?
It has never made sense to treat an over responsive immune malfunction with destruction? Satan is the thief and destroyer; so now medicine is used as a tool for Satan? That is the depth of my heart and how my pure heart understands it. I guess I am just too spiritual for this world? God created our immune system for survival in a dangerous ecosystem that contains plenty of ammunition that the enemy intends to use for destruction. Our bodies divinely use homeostasis to adapt to our surroundings. I can’t deny that some of the medications achieved the desired momentary result and have been beneficial initially for survival, however, 20+ years of immune suppression is excessive and outweighs the good. Less really is more and moderation is key with anything in life. Drugs have taken the role of instant gratification by current medical standards and are manipulative tools against intelligent design. Keeping someone alive to just survive has never been my desire; quality over quantity is my goal. I just wish the purpose of medicine was to actually improve health and not just mask symptoms and problems afflicted by this broken and deceptive world.
Ephesians 6:12-13New Living Translation (NLT)
12 For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.
13 Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm.
I could list so many scriptures because I have been living the scriptures and I’m tired of living in a one dimensional world based only on the physical, when Life is the product of the Spirit. After recently documenting my medical history to apply for disability, I realized on paper I probably appear dead? Over just the last 23 years I have had 17 surgeries, 28 hospital admissions, and 390 appointments since 2004 at one location for care. However, I am more alive than ever by the Holy Spirit; who is my strength in my weakness and limitations.
James 1:2-3New Living Translation (NLT)
Faith and Endurance
2 Dear brothers and sisters,[a] when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. 3 For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.
As a result of my endurance, I finally found an answer on my Mayo clinic profile to all the horrible reactions to medications that I have experienced. They were able to do some genetic blood tests, which did indicate an explanation of my medication issues. It is actually very technical, however, I have proof now!

Service Date/Time: 29-Mar-2016 19:31
Provider: Daniel E. Maddox, MD Pager: 4-7398

Pharmacogenomic analysis of the patient’s drug metabolizing enzymes demonstrated several potentially clinically significant abnormalities. First, the patient is an intermediate metabolizer for catechol-O-methyltransferase, and this means that she is at some risk for toxic side effects if multiple doses of adrenaline are given in the course of a resuscitation event. The patient is a potentially
altered rapid metabolizer of CYP1A2, and this potential can be
stimulated by exposure to certain environmental substances as listed in the complete laboratory report. The patient is a potential altered rapid metabolizer of CYP2C19, which means that pro drugs may get converted to active variants at an accelerated pace and lead to toxicities and compounds which are active in their native form may require larger than expected doses in order to achieve clinically useful blood levels. The patient is an intermediate
metabolizer for CYP2C9, which means that she is at
increased risk of toxic side effects and accumulation of
abnormally elevated blood levels with standard doses of the drugs handled by this center. The patient is normal for
CYP2D6-related drugs and normal for CYP3A4-related
drugs. #MyBodyDoesNotLie
So clearly even in illness; there is nothing common about me and I’m satisfied with that. The last 2 decades have been such a growing process that keeps me connected and seeking the Light and Truth of Jesus and His Supernatural and phenomenal ways. I never wanted to be identified by my illness, however, I think I could be famous for being ill? So I guess I am coming out of the medical closet. God can make illness into an art form. My body is loud and I believe my God can silence it; if not in this life, then for eternity. God continues to divinely lead me to bits and pieces of Heaven.

Single Because

So I find it interesting and misguided the fascination that married people have with single people? Although I realize the sentiment isn’t necessarily malice, it is in itself peculiar to ask “Why are you single?” I have wondered should I be asking couples “Why are you married?” SMH , I don’t know, it just never occurred to me to wonder about another persons path and choices in life? I wasn’t aware that we were all on the same path and had the same goals in life? Where did I go wrong; I don’t think I have? Maybe if I somehow felt equipped to plan my life in this broken world and see everything and know all, it might be an option? Maybe it is because I’m a perfectionist, so naturally I am seeking and trusting the only perfect, constant, and truth in life that I know; which is the creator and designer of my life and others.
So to explain: I am single because I do not have an agenda in this world. I humbly realize Gods plans and timing are so much better than my own. I know this because I have taken my time and practiced patience; which the Bible promotes! Patience is a virtue and we become what we seek. Secondly, why is it assumed that if you are not married, it is a must have? Sadly the worldly idea of marriage does not intrigue me at all. I am 43 and know several people my age that have been married and divorced twice by now; this alone should cause people to question timing of marriage and should not be rushed? Maybe, just maybe, I was meant to be like Paul and single? I have no idea because I never got those specific plans that apparently the rest of the married people received? lol I’m thankful I have always been able to embrace my path and choose the less traveled road and I haven’t done it on my own! Typically in past relationships they distracted me from my relationship with God, which is a big red flag. All I know is that I guess I’m lazy and want God to figure it out for me? 😉 I also sometimes wonder if desiring marriage so badly could actually lead to spiritual coveting; which is not a choice that God allows my heart to make. There are so many scriptures that speak to me in my singleness.

1 Corinthians 13:4-5New Revised Standard Version (NRSV)

4 Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;

If you seek Love in a marriage, you better be patient since Love is patient! Maybe that is a major difference in what I seek? I am not seeking marriage, I seek Love honestly and I don’t feel void of it either being single. If you aren’t able to experience Love while single, you will never be able to give any to receive and doing it wrong. I experience great love from friends, family, and even others I’ve never met or seen. Love is spiritual and too many focus on the physical it seems?
My theory is, if you focus on what you don’t have, you will miss what you have. So I am focusing on what I have in Christ and sincerely grateful.

Ecclesiastes 6:9New Living Translation (NLT)

9 Enjoy what you have rather than desiring what you don’t have. Just dreaming about nice things is meaningless—like chasing the wind.

Maybe, just maybe, I have something being single that most people can’t see and it’s called faith, hope, and Love and it’s more than enough for me!

Darkness Meets Light

BeTheChange You don’t wait for others to set the tone, you lead by example and have an affinity for helping others. With your personal mantra, ” Be the change you wish to see in the world,” your ultimate goal in life is to make the world a kinder and more habitable place for all.

In this moment I realize why I am a “night owl” ; when the majority of the world is in slumber I find the most peace and calm energy. I’ve always had this ability for energy to encompass me. It’s almost as if I have a stronger and less congested connection to God in the darkness; which actually makes complete sense because God is Light! Of course He would shine in the dark! It is in these moments I find so many thoughts of Heaven in my head, when the rest of the world is in their bed. I discovered another label for myself: Christian Hedonist ( I truly find Joy in Jesus and His word ) I so just want so desperately to know I am serving Him in my employment. Why does this seem to be so unattainable in the world? I also know that is why God has allowed my situation with my health to transpire the way it has recently. It has allowed me to detach from work in a dramatic way and recognize the way my job has been perpetuating all my health issues and draining me spiritually too. I’ve also most recently discovered how I fit with passionate and purpose driven people; it’s all or nothing in my world clearly. I miss working with those types of people! The things you can learn about yourself late at night. Well if anybody happens to have any words of wisdom or insight to share, it’s the reason I am putting it out there. I am a learner and a seeker of wisdom and goodness who realizes my flaw in chasing perfection. Well goodnight all or Good Morning! Today is another day to find me.

Back to Broken Reality

When you are going through a chronic and serious illness, the shallowness of the world really  brings you down. Many of my authentic followers of Christ will understand this and have even written about it as well. I thought I had found mutual understanding in a group that was based on the movie “Old Fashioned” , however, and very sadly at this point, the direction changed or I finally recognized the hearts of some members. I guess once again I am putting up my brick wall? No…,.. in my defense and the character Clay I am guarding my heart. I am using my time wisely; it is not optional when you are living like you are dying and I’m not trying to be over dramatic either. Time is way too precious to allow superficial and fake people to damage your soul further. More and more the word “Love” is all about “ME” and what I need to seek? I just don’t follow that kind of warped disingenuous love. I am also realizing how much I value my married friends; it’s like I’m single with a married soul. It makes sense because I am truly committed to my relationship with my Lord first and staying out of the way of my lack of grace at points. I don’t know but in the wedding vows:  what God has joined together means He does the work. I just have never felt the need to seek what only my creator who designed me knows and His plans and timing. When you become one with God, only then can you be one with another person? I see my married friends as one, I really do! I respect them both in their relationships and value authentic Love that they reciprocate. When you have a pure heart you are kind of like a kid only with boundaries and pure intentions. I am learning once again how people misuse words. Intentional is not the same as manipulative or calculated; to me, I think it is closer to being selfless? In everything I do I try and let Jesus do His thing in me; also shine His light, which will attract a similar soul. I think it is working fabulous so far; no regrets, most of them just happen to be married or children. That is why I work hard to do and be what God asks me to be; it’s not my vision or timing. If Satan tries to destroy it, I will still have God, dignity and some quite amazing authentic friends that have invested in my life and I in theirs. I don’t care what you call it, dating or courting, all that matters is Loving and friendship; it is always constant. It is obvious I don’t buy in to the romance thing either; I find it pretty pretentious, unless it is truly planned by the book of the Bible and not the usual book of love, however, I am a champion for Love gone right! I think some very simple things like a photo booth picture from the 1940’s of my grandparents is romantic. But lets face it, what do I know? My answer would hopefully be Jesus. My grandma and grandpa didn’t show physical affection; we never hugged or kissed, it was an unspoken Love with actions that have lasted beyond death. They created two children, so it is not as if they never had physical intimacy; it was just something sacred. Often when I reflect all the sacrifices they have made for me and my security, I want so deeply for them to know how grateful I am for the memories and lessons. Now that’s old fashioned! I guess I needed a good cry tonight? If it weren’t for Jesus Christ I wouldn’t know  genuine Love.grandparentsphotobooth1